17 weeks!

How far along? 17 weeks

Baby is the size of an: Onion, about 5 inches long and 5 ounces 

Total weight gain: 8.5 pounds! Eeek! But totally within normal range at this point. 

Stretch marks? Just the one on my boob!

Maternity clothes? I'm wearing my belly band on a daily basis and it's getting pretty annoying. My pants are starting to fit a little too snug even with the band, so it's definitely time for some comfy maternity pants! 

Sleep: Still only getting up once to go pee, but tossing and turning so much that my sleep is getting interrupted from changing positions so much. 

Best moment this week: Finding out the gender! I'll write more down below! 

Miss anything? My favorite beer.... Dos Equis. Soon enough.... 

Food cravings: Nothing new this week! Just hungry all the damn time.

Anything making you queasy or sick? Nope! 

Gender: BOY!!!!! 

Labor signs: Hopefully not for a very long time! 

Symptoms: Peeing and hungry all the time, gassy, occasional headaches which are probably work related- not baby related, I've started getting sharp jabbing pains in my lower abdomen. Like low low pelvic area. Use your imagination. They hurt and pretty much stop me in my tracks. The nurse practitioner at my OB GYN's office didn't seem too concerned by them and just said to drink more water, which I already drink a ton of, and to get a belly support belt. 

Belly button in or out?  In.

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Happy or moody most of the time: Happy.... And my sassyness has gone up a notch this week. Baby is giving me less of a filter this week. 

Looking forward to: Feeling movement! 

This was the most exciting week yet. Last Friday we had our 3D/4D ultrasound done and found out we're having a boy!!! Our parents, my sister and brother in law all went with us and because Chris' brother and fiancé are in Texas, we face timed them so they could find out with us! As soon as his goods showed up on the screen I blurted out, "It's a Boy!!" I instantly started crying. It was so emotional and amazing to know what our little miracle is. We've had a boy name picked out for years so it wasn't hard to figure out what his name was going to be. It's nice to finally call baby by his name, Caleb, rather than 'it' or 'baby', although I still catch myself reverting back to those. 

After the ultrasound we all went to lunch and then to Buy Buy Baby to do some browsing. Naturally, Chris and I had to buy something..... So we splurged and bought a 4Moms Mommaroo. It's amazing and I wish they made one for adults! 

We also had a prenatal appointment this week, where we met with the nurse practitioner because my OB GYN wasn't in. She was very thorough and went through quite a bit of information with us. We heard Caleb's heartbeat and it was a strong 148 bpm. I've gained a total of 8.5 pounds so far, which is totally within the normal range of 5-10 pounds by this point. I try to eat as healthy as I can, but sometimes Caleb wants a Veggie Works burrito from Del Taco and that's what he gets. Meat or leftovers don't always sound the greatest. I'm drinking well over 72 ounces of water a day and peeing all the time as a result. Sometimes I can't get enough ice cold water. 

At our appointment, we got our orders for the anatomy ultrasound and fetal echocardiogram. The anatomy ultrasound will be February 20th and should take about an hour. Our fetal echocardiogram is scheduled for March 3rd and will take about 2 hours. They're going to monitor and look in depth at Caleb's heart to check for any abnormalities. According to Dr. Norian and my OB GYN, babies conceived via IVF have a slightly higher risk of heart abnormalities and no one really knows why. 

Chris and I are such planners that we've already started working on the nursery. We have paint picked out and a basic idea of what color schemes we're going to use to decorate. I'm not set on a theme and don't really want one. I'm not into super baby themed nurseries with animals, planes or trucks. So we'll see what we come up with and what the final outcome will be!

 

By the way, my belly feels large and in charge this week. Caleb is definitely making his presence known and growing! I still haven't felt any movement yet though! 

Alissha 

15 weeks

How far along? 15 weeks

Baby is the size of a: Navel Orange

Total weight gain: 4 pounds

Stretch marks? Just the one on my boob!

Maternity clothes? If my belly band counts, then yes. 

Sleep: Still only getting up once to go pee, but I'm definitely tossing and turning more this week. 

Best moment this week: Finding out the biopsy taken from my left tonsil came back benign! All is well. 

Miss anything? Definitely sushi...

Food cravings: I haven't had any legit cravings so far, only things that sound  good. Towards the end of this week my appetite has started to go away and nothing sounds good to eat. 

Anything making you queasy or sick? Nope! 

Gender: We find out next Friday!! 

Labor signs: Hopefully not for a very long time! 

Symptoms: Peeing all the time, gassy, burpy, still getting those sharp pains inside my hip bones if I get up too fast, turn a certain way or sneeze hard and my back has started to hurt during the day. Last Sunday, at church we had to leave early because I thought I was going to pass out. Out of nowhere I broke out in a sweat all over my body and felt super dizzy. As soon as we walked outside and I got some cool air I felt better though. 

Belly button in or out?  In.

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Happy or moody most of the time: Happy.... With a little bit of sassyness.

Looking forward to: Our gender ultrasound next Friday! I'm so anxious to find out what this little nugget is! 

Alissha 

14 Weeks

How far along? 14 weeks!! Officially in the 2nd Trimester! 

Baby is the size of a: Lemon

Total weight gain: 4 pounds

Stretch marks? Just the one on my boob!

Maternity clothes? No, but my jeans are getting pretty snug around my waist. 

Sleep: Pretty decent, only waking up to go pee!

Best moment this week: Finally being out of the 1st Trimester.

Miss anything? Nope!

Food cravings: Hot wings, fresh fruit smoothies, V8 tomato juice, still loving pickles and cereal.

Anything making you queasy or sick? Nope! 

Gender: No idea! I really want a boy, so it's probably a girl! 

Labor signs: Hopefully not for a very long time! 

Symptoms: I'm definitely peeing a lot more this week, hungry all the time- I can't get enough snacks throughout the day, gassy, burpy, still getting those sharp pains inside my hip bones if I get up too fast, turn a certain way or sneeze hard and my back has started to hurt if I lay certain ways. 

Belly button in or out?  In.

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Happy or moody most of the time: Happy this week! 

Looking forward to: Finding out the gender on the 23rd!!!

Alissha 

12 Weeks! Holy moly!

How far along? 12 weeks!!

Baby is the size of a: Large Plum

Total weight gain: About 3 pounds.

Stretch marks? Just the one on my boob!

Maternity clothes?  No, but my jeans are getting pretty snug around my waist. 

Sleep: Pretty decent this week, only waking up to go pee!

Best moment this week: Getting our doppler so we can listen to the baby's heartbeat whenever we want! 

Miss anything? Not this week.

Food cravings: Pickles, Cereal, Pepperocinis, Flaming Hot Cheetos with Limon (awful, I know!) Pretty much anything spicy, salty or sour is delicious right now. 

Anything making you queasy or sick? Nope!

Gender: No idea! I really want a boy, so it's probably a girl! 

Labor signs: Hopefully not for a very long time! 

Symptoms: Hungry, bloated, moody, and dizzy off and on. I've gotten some pretty bad gas pains this week and pulling pains on the inside of my hip bones. I assume it's due to things growing and expanding. The bloat has been insane this week. Last night I looked like I was 6 months pregnant! 

Belly button in or out?  In.

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Happy or moody most of the time: 

Definitely moody. 

Looking forward to: Being out of the 1st Trimester, our first pre-natal appointment with my OB-GYN and finding out the baby's gender! 

Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you have a great day spending it with family and friends! 

We have an appointment set for our 3D/4D gender ultrasound! January 23rd cannot come any sooner! I am so anxious to find out what we're having. I'll be 16 weeks then and should definitely be able to see the goods.... If baby cooperates! 

This week I got my first head cold since I've been pregnant. It's been awful and I've just felt so crummy. I tried really hard not to take anything, but needed some relief so I took some Sudafed (yes, it's safe).  I've also been using my Neti-Pot which has made a world of difference. I hope it goes away quickly because I absolutely hate being a mouth breather. 

Have a great day everyone!! 

Alissha 

10 Weeks!

How far along? 10 weeks

Baby is the size of a: Prune

Total weight gain: 2 pounds? It fluctuates too much to really know. 

Stretch marks? None on my belly, but one decided to sneak up on my boob this week! 

Maternity clothes?  I purchased a few tops and maternity leggings from PinkBlushMaternity.com on Black Friday because they were having such a good sale, but I have yet to wear them. 

Sleep: I've been sleeping pretty good. I get up once or twice during the night to go to the restroom. 

Best moment this week: Seeing our baby at our appointment yesterday and "graduating" from our fertility clinic.  I have officially been released to my Ob-Gyn.  My first appointment with my Ob-Gyn is tentatively scheduled for December 31st, but that might change when they get their January calendar so that Chris can go to the appointment with me.  

Miss anything? Not this week! 

Food cravings: Salty, sour and spicy foods.  Claussen pickles in the morning? Yes please! Cheerios and Cuties are still pretty tasty. 

Anything making you queasy or sick? Nope! I haven't gotten nauseous at all this week.  Thank you baby! 

Gender: No idea! 

Labor signs: Hopefully not for a very long time! 

Symptoms: Hungry and emotional.  When i'm hungry, I have to eat or I get super crabby.  If I get up too fast or move a certain way, I get sharp pains in my hips.  It's really strange, but Dr. Norian said it's probably just growing/stretching pains. 

Belly button in or out?  In.

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Happy or moody most of the time: I asked Chris if he thought i've been moody lately and he immediately answered "Yeeeeeeeessssssssss"....... so true. 

Looking forward to: My belly popping out and actually looking pregnant, not like I ate one too many donuts!

Yesterday was bittersweet as we graduated from our fertility clinic.  Dr. Norian told me I could resume all normal activity and stop my estrogen supplements immediately.  Unfortunately, I have to wean off of the progesterone, but I will be all done with it by Monday! Hallelujah! I got all of my medical records from the very beginning of our IVF journey to give to my Ob-Gyn and they gave us a sweet gender neutral baby blanket.  

We will definitely be keeping in touch with Dr. Norian and his staff throughout the rest of the pregnancy and when our baby arrives.  We can't say enough good things about the staff at HRC Fertility.  They really took the time with us and it meant so much to always see Dr. Norian at every appointment.  At our previous fertility clinic, we saw someone different each time and it got really annoying.  We felt like there was no consistency and we were just a number.  Dr. Norian performed all of my ultrasounds, the egg retrieval, embryo transfers and was available by phone any time we needed him.  Our nurse, Saba, was always available by phone or e-mail, as well, to answer any questions and put my mind at ease.  If you or anyone  you know are looking for a fertility doctor, I highly recommend HRC Fertility Rancho Cucamonga.  We will definitely be going back for baby number two when we're ready (and if we don't conceive naturally the next go around).

Our baby has grown so much since our last ultrasound.  It is absolutely amazing.  It has little arms and legs that are already starting to kick and flail around in my belly.  I can't wait to actually feel it move and then when Chris can feel it too.  The heartbeat was strong at 165 bpm and it measured 3 days ahead of schedule.  In the picture below, the baby is upside down. You can see it's little arms!!

Alissha

Baby Benson(s) due July 2015!!

We're pregnant! I AM PREGNANT! I am so shocked! I'm like super pregnant! 

The last two weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions for me, hence why I haven't updated my blog. So here's what's been going on....

After the transfer, I felt so positive. For the first 48 hours I stayed on bed rest. I had cramping during that time, which was to be expected after the transfer but nothing unbearable. 3-4dp5dt (3-4 days past 5 day transfer) I felt occasional cramping, but nothing like the first two days. It was very mild and this was when my roller coaster started to go down. I started doubting this cycle and thinking I should have felt more by that time and I wasn't. 

On 5dp5dt, my lower back ached all day. It was as if I moved heavy boxes the day before, which I didn't. At about 5:30 that evening, I went to the restroom and noticed light spotting. I kinda freaked out. I thought either my cervix was getting irritated from the awesome progesterone suppositories I have to use 3 times a day or my period was coming. I thought it was too late in the cycle for implantation bleeding and that didn't really cross my mind as an option. 

The next day, on 6dp5dt I went back to work and sent an e-mail to my nurse about my backache, spotting and getting my blood test moved to October 31st instead of November 3rd. A few hours later, I got a call from my nurse. She told me the spotting and backache could be a pregnancy symptom or my period on its way. I don't get a back ache before starting my period, ever. She told me to just take it easy and they weren't too worried about the spotting since it wasn't heavy and it only happened the one time. The doctor was okay with me doing the pregnancy blood test on the 31st, but if the results were negative he still wanted me to test the next week. That evening, I fell asleep on the couch around 8. I was exhausted. 

On 7 and 8dp5dt, I had a little spotting again. It was very very light, but enough for this neurotic chick to notice it. I also started becoming really thirsty, despite drinking a ton of water. I've been drinking nearly 3 liters of water a day and still can't get enough. My mouth isn't dry, but I just feel thirsty. So with drinking a lot of water, comes more frequent trips to the bathroom. I also lost my appetite around this time. I'm hungry, but nothing sounds good to eat. I've basically just been eating foods I know I like rather than things that sound good to eat, if that makes sense. I did get tired during the day and wanted to nap, but of course I couldn't at work. 

9dp5dt, the same continued. I had aching cramps, very similar to starting my period. I've had little pinching sensations in my uterus and almost tugging sensations from my belly button since 7dp5dt. It's very strange. 

On 10dp5dt, October 31st I woke up hungry. I went and had my blood drawn at 9:15, then Chris and I went to breakfast at one of our favorite places. Afterwards, we went to the outlets to shop and help pass the time before we got the phone call. At 2pm, my nurse called me. My heart instantly started to race and I put the phone on speaker so we could both hear the results. The nurse said she was calling to let me know the lab hadn't received my samples to do the test! Despite going in first thing in the morning and the test being ordered STAT. She let me know the office closed at 4 that day and they may or may not get the results in time. She said if they do come in after 4, the doctor may or may not call me. I was not happy and did not want to wait until Monday for the results. I told Chris I wanted to stop at the store and get a pregnancy test. He agreed since I would have found out the results that day anyways. 

After an hour or so, we left the outlets and stopped at the store on our way home. At about 3:30, I took the test cause I was so anxious. I was seriously expecting it to be negative. My boobs didn't hurt at all and so many women experience that as their first symptom. I dipped the test and set it on the counter as Chris and I watched it. The 'pregnant' line came up instantly and so much darker than I expected. I was shocked and said a few curse words. I cried and so did Chris. We were and are ecstatic. I kept looking at the test and thinking I didn't "feel" pregnant at all. I was in complete shock. 

I never got a phone call on Friday. I took another pregnancy test Saturday morning to make sure the line was just as dark, If not darker, and it was a tad darker than the control line. At about 10 am, our doctor called me and we talked about how frustrated we were with the lab and how nothing goes as planned. He told me my progesterone and HcG (pregnancy hormone) came back "outstanding" and I am in fact pregnant! He said my estrogen was a little low, but he wasn't too concerned about it. I just have to increase my estrogen medication a little. My first beta HcG at 10dp5dt came back at 229! Anything over 100 is amazing. 

I go back on Thursday for my next HcG test to make sure the numbers are increasing.  By that time, my HcG should be around 900 or higher.  If all comes back good, then I'll have an ultrasound the following week to see how many babies were expecting! 

We are ecstatic and over the moon. We feel so blessed that we are finally pregnant! After nearly 4 years of actively trying, our prayers have been answered. Thank you all for your kind words, thoughts, support and prayers. They mean more than you know! 

Alissha 

Sticky thoughts!

This morning we had our second embryo transfer, but first frozen embryo transfer. We left the house at about 5:20 so we could be in Pasadena by 7 and although traffic was horrible, we were only about 5 minutes late. By the time we got to the clinic I had to pee.... Bad. For embryo transfers they like you to have a full bladder and since my bladder is the size of a walnut and gets full after a sip of water, I was ready to burst. 

They didn't call us back until a little after 7:30 and the nurse checked my bladder via ultrasound to make sure it was full, despite me telling her I was ready to pee my pants. When she checked, she thought my bladder may have been too full and asked me if I would be able to release a little bit and then stop. I told her that was a negative, but if needed I would do whatever the doctor wanted. She decided to let Dr. Norian make the final decision. 

When Dr. Norian came in, he told us both embryos survived the thaw. They are both graded 4AB. I'm not exactly sure what that means other than the quality of the inner cells is A and the outer layer is B... I think. Anyway, they're good quality embryos and that's all I care about. We still have 3 frozen embryos that we can use at a later date and although they're not as good of quality, I'm still happy we have 3. 

Our two beautiful embryos ☺️ 

Despite my bladder being pushed on by the ultrasound and trying not to pee everywhere, the transfer was easy. Dr. Norian decided my bladder wasn't too full and said it would make it a bit easier. It was just like our fresh transfer back in July, except I decided to hold my bladder for the full 30 minutes afterwards so I could stay laying down. I think I asked Chris what time it was every few minutes cause I could not wait to go to the bathroom! 

Our babies are right where the arrow is. The black area above is my bursting bladder. It's so amazing to watch the transfer on the ultrasound. We could see the embryos, surrounded in the fluid they were kept in, shoot out of the catheter. Dr. Norian told me to think "sticky thoughts" and be on bed rest for the next 48 hours. After that, I can do light activity but nothing strenuous. I'm off work the rest of the week and won't go back until Monday. I have plenty of time to rest so our babies can get nice and comfy! I've spent the majority of the day in bed or in the recliner and not doing too much. 

We're praying these little babies decide to stick around and we get to see their beautiful faces in 9 months. Thank you all for your continued support, well wishes and prayers!!

Alissha 

What Infertility Has Cost Us

Lately I've been wondering how much we've spent on fertility treatments, tests and medications over the last year and a half. I decided to go through all our receipts and add up what we had and that's the number I got.... $21,383.51. That doesn't include the hundreds I've probably spent on pregnancy or ovulation predictor tests over the last 3 years and 9 months or what we will still be spending over the next month or so. 

I'm not surprised by how much we've spent. We've definitely felt the impact and even more so lately with the cost of IVF. Our health insurance doesn't cover any fertility treatments or any of the fertility medications, so pretty much everything has been spent out of pocket. We've paid for everything ourselves with the help of credit cards and try to pay cash as much as possible so we don't have to charge anything. It's hard. 

I know there are other couples out there that have spent way more than we have and for that, I feel blessed. I've seen some couples set up Go Fund Me accounts to get help paying for IVF and I really have mixed emotions about that. It's something I wouldn't do, but to each their own. 

We would spend ten times what we have already to have a baby of our own. We get asked if we've considered adoption and I get a little annoyed with that. People think it's so easy to adopt and if we can't have children of our own that's a logical alternative. What most don't understand is that it can be very expensive to adopt and it's a lengthy process. Until we've exhausted all efforts to have our own biological children, we won't be looking into adoption. 

Alissha 

Plans for our FET cycle

This go around I want to do things a little differently. First and foremost, I want to some how not be so stressed or overwhelmed by it all. I think going through it before will help since I'll know what to expect this time. I'm going to try my hardest to steer clear from Google and over-analyzing everything that's going on with my body. My goal is to take it one day at a time. 

I really want to wean myself off of caffeine by the time we do our transfer, so I've switched to half-caff coffee for starters. So far so good! 

Of course I won't be drinking heavily or drinking at all after our transfer, but I think it's okay to have a drink here and there on the weekends or special occasions. 

As far as the gym goes.... I really didn't get back into it like I thought I would after finding out we had a chemical pregnancy. I'm not going to make excuses because they're all pretty lame, but I have been trying to go to the gym or stay active atleast 3 days a week. I think it's important to listen to your body and eat healthy. Hopefully over the next week or so I can get back into my routine, just not as hardcore. 

Yesterday I started my first dose of birth control and we got our treatment calendar for the cycle. There's less ultrasounds and blood work and I won't have any injections this go around. We have our first ultrasound and blood work scheduled for September 30th (my birthday!) and then I'll start estrogen the day after.  If everything goes as planned, our embryo transfer should be October 21st : ) Finally having a date gives me some relief and something to look forward to. I know it's going to be here before we know it and then the two weeks we have to wait for our pregnancy test will take fooooorrreeeeevvvver! 

Alissha 

Day 1!

After being 4 days late, and thinking for a split second that maybe I got pregnant naturally (Ha!) my cycle finally started today. I couldn't wait to call our fertility clinic to start our frozen embryo cycle. We were a little worried the embryo transfer would interfere with our planned trip to the 49ers and Chiefs game on October 5th, but it turns out the frozen cycles take a lot longer to prepare for than a fresh IVF cycle! 

So, tomorrow I'll start birth control again for a couple of weeks to suppress my ovaries and get the timing of the transfer just right. After the birth control, I'll start estrogen in pill and patch form to build up the lining of my uterus to at least 8 millimeters, about 2 weeks. When it reaches that marker, I'll start progesterone (yuck!) to prepare for the transfer. Once things are going as planned, they'll thaw our babies and schedule the transfer. The nurse thinks the transfer will happen mid to late October! We'll get our calendar with all the dates within the next 24 hours, but for now.... I am so excited to be starting this crazy journey again and feel so hopeful that we'll be pregnant by the end of this year : ) 

Alissha